Perpetual Bliss

For the last few days, Father has been singing the lyrics of Faith Hill’s song This Kiss. Specifically, the concept of perpetual bliss. I like the concept. Very much so. 😂

Yesterday morning, one of the visions I saw was of His bedroom. It was weird because it was on my left. Most things are on my right side when I see them or straight before me. For it to be on the left was very odd. It felt significant. I kept looking at the position of it…it was located at about the 10:30 position on a clock face.

It made me think of several things I have seen and/or heard in the last few days. I saw a wooden clock face. It was at 12:30. Straight up North and straight down South. I also heard…we are out of time.

For oodles of years, I have passionately pursued Father. This notion of being in His bed with Him…has burned within me for many years. It has been a driving force in my heart. I would say this love is what has kept me in a relationship with Him during the hardest of times. Five years of Hell…nearly destroyed that…turns out I am still here. More resilient than I gave myself credit for.

This morning, I saw the bedroom and the closed door to it. We had a convo about that. I told Him again…the only one who can stop me from getting into that bedroom is you. I will give up everyone and everything to get there. There is no one and nothing that can stop me. I am going in.

If I Die, I Die

Something I have said on repeat for these oodles of years…I have to see you face to face. There is this biblical contradiction that I have discussed with Him during these years. Moses spoke to Him face to face…had to wear a veil over his face as a result of this. Yet there is this idea also that you can’t see His face, or you will die.

I have two responses for Him regarding this.

One…YOU say…through Christ ALL things are possible. SO DON’T tell me it is impossible to see YOU face to face. I call your bluff on that. Through Christ, I can.

Two…if it will kill me to see your face…then kill me…cuz I am GOING to see you face to face. If I have to die to see your face…then it is a win-win for me. I will be with you finally. I see no downsides to this idea. Whether I live or die, I will have seen your face. Either way…I am with you.

What is the point of living if I can’t see Him face-to-face? He is the point of life. 🤷‍♀️ This is preschool math to me. Easy peasy. Life or death…I must see Him.

I told Him this morning when I saw the bedroom door again…open the damn door. 🚪😂

Per my M.O., I said…Holy Spirit…take me by the hand and lead me to the truth. Christ, tell me the truths I need to get into that bedroom. Father…help me. Open the damn door.

Wolf

I saw a wolf this morning too. Man…he was a BEAUT!!!!!!!! Never seen a more beautiful wolf. He was a stunner. Catch your breath stunner.

Coal black fur with piercing blue eyes. Sky blue eyes. Clear and clean eyes. He was on the prowl and staring straight at me. It was a close-up of him.

You would think that would have negative connotations. Dark. Wolves…predator and prey. Wolves in sheep’s clothing. Lots of negative stuff to wolves biblically speaking…but this one was gorgeous.

I think he was positive. Felt powerful in a good way. 🤷‍♀️

Haven’t a clue what he means either. Waiting for Father to explain Himself. I feel like Desi Arnaz as Ricky Ricardo at times…you got some ‘splainin’ to do. Father does. Lots of ‘splainin.’ Years of ‘splainin.’ 😜

Coaching

I came to a conclusion today…several of them. Coaching Hannah is like trying to give a cat a bath. You are GOING to get all scratched up in the process. 😂🤨🤦‍♀️

It also reminds me of past conversations about wrestling hogs with friends and family who were hog farmers.

This reminded me of Donovan entering a hog wrestling contest with his buddies at a county fair while he was in high school. I have pictures or a video of the event somewhere. He was a muddy mess by the time those few minutes came to an end.

Being a life coach to Hannah reminds me of these visions of hog wrestling. You are going to be muddy and exhausted when you are done.

It is a wrestling competition here.

Let me clue you in on the end of the battle before we get there. I AM going to be the victor here. NOT going to fight a losing battle.

Can I just say this here? I HATE it when parents abdicate their parental duties and spiritual/emotional obligations to their children. HATE IT!!! 🤬

Parents who do this to their naturally born children deserve every bit of eternal punishment they get in Hell. Not going to feel one bit sorry for them.

Just felt the need to say that and make it clear to all.

Treat

Hence the pedicure as a treat to myself. Had no idea that was on the schedule today. I needed some time today…quiet time. Been feeling like I am going to open up my bottle of bourbon from my Leipers Fork Distillery tour. It keeps gnawing at me. A pin Father keeps showing me. I needed a stopper for it, or I would have opened it up the other day.

Today, I decided to head to a local kitchen store I frequent. Thought I might pick up a stopper there and peruse the kitchen goodies. Love me some kitchen goodies.

I walked in and the two women wanted to know if I needed help. I informed them I needed some alone time and why. They laughed at me. We had a great convo about Le Creuset.

Man…I gotta share this. I have had this long-time dream of owning a set of Le Creuset.

Now…I don’t NEED it. I just want it. It is SO PRETTY!!!!!!!!!! For YEARS…I drool over the stuff. It is SO EXPENSIVE…but it calls my name out…every time I see it.

Crystal…come look at me. Crystal…buy me…you KNOW you want me. 🤪

I saw Geoffrey Zakarian cooking with this massive Le Creuset stockpot on a cooking show one time…my heart was palpating.

Dreams

I shared with the women…I have a super expensive set of cookware that is 30 years old. Looks brand new still (minus the handles.) It has been like gold to me all these years.

THEN…I have a cast iron collection of Griswold and Wagner skillets and pans. They are GEMS in the kitchen.

I don’t NEED Le Creuset…I just want it.

I want to treat myself to a set of Le Creuset. Thinking I would mix two colors…like do the blue and maybe the gray pans. Idk…dreaming.

Why?? Haven’t a clue.

Must be Father.

The other day He reminded me…going to make all your dreams come true. That perpetual bliss kind of thing.

Totally on board with this idea. 😍

Lastly

Ok…gotta share this last little tidbit before I call it quits today. I am outside tonight killing every mosquito that is trying to suck my blood. They are slowing down my blogging progress. 🤨

Although I had a rough patch today, my day has ended well. Had a little break and treated myself to a pedi with some alone time.

Then…a fun and funny evening.

Our family has been dealing with a saga for the last few months.

In our family, we don’t have secrets. We are a team, and we are in this together. If you come after one of us, you are coming after the whole family. It is only one thing I cherish about my kids and the family we have formed.

We have been patiently waiting to start putting the whammy on a bully. Maybe someday I can share the story, but not at this time. We have added another member to our little group. The protective nature is coming into play.

My Heart

Mr. Mitchell Man is super loving. Incredibly sensitive. Very respectful. But…when you aren’t doing right by someone, the man steps up and does what needs to be done. So proud of him. The first time I watched him do that was when he was in high school. Super proud mom moment. He always stands up to the bullies. No fear there in that man. My heart!!!!!!!! Skinny little man but MIGHTY in strength and power inside. Same with Donovan.

Today, he stood up to a bully. We have been waiting for this moment. The timing had to be right. There is always an order to the process.

We ALL wanted the scoop. The 411. We waited until Donovan got home from work. Donovan and Vanessa went over to Bobbi and Mitchell’s. Vanessa called me on speaker phone so Hannah and I could be a part of the convo. It was GREAT fun!!!!!!!

This is the family I wanted to raise. Strength. Honor. Respect. Courage. Bravery. Camaraderie. Unity. Loyalty. Integrity. Warriors. L.O.V.E. Speakers of the truth. Those who stand for the truth.

Oh my…so so much wonderfulness there.

We laughed so hard together this evening. A family unified in taking care of the weak and helpless. Unified in holding those accountable for their wrongdoing. A family unified to wait until the time was right…for Father’s timing…not our own.

Leadership

One important aspect is watching my son lead by putting others’ welfare above his own.

MAN!!!!!!! Proud Momma.

Having our whole family supporting Mitchell…supporting the weak…the underdog…awesome. We are supporting each other. Loved hearing my sons encouraging one another over the phone. Loved hearing the love and friendship of brothers…men. Men in their manhood. Clean masculinity.

I am reaping what I have sown for over 30 years of HARD LABOR.

Damn…feeling MIGHTY good this evening.

Getting the shit beat out of me…seems to be worth it now. On this side of it…all the hard labor is paying off.

It feels good.

Alrighty folks…the skeeters are getting on my last nerve…so I am calling this post done. Signing off. Going to sit and meditate on the blissful life I am starting to enjoy. More to come.

I just keep telling Him…bring it on baby. I’ll take ALL you are dishing out. Love me some lovin.’ 😜